Aman's Blog….ANYTHING goes here!

Pics & Plus, Google Plus…. June 30, 2011

This is going to be very short and quick one and it will be about two things!

One, I am not a photographer so I just clicked some pics in my last week’s Singapore’s tour. If you are interested in few randomly clicked , click here.

Two, all talk about Facebook and how cool it is! Well, I don’t think that it’s cool but its not a complete piece of crap either. And its just highly unlikely, the big daddy of web world, Google will just sit and watch FB laughing on it over making Buzz and trying to create Wave. If you think that those two were the (failed) desperate attempts of Google to come in the social world and they can’t get it right, well, say hello to Google Plus, a new platform of Google which is not just a social platform from the giant but also would bring new changes to Google as well in the subsequent time to come. If you haven’t heard about it, read about it from the below link, right from the master himself,

http://googleblog.blogspot.com/2011/06/introducing-google-project-real-life.html

And here are two more links to explain about it a little more,

http://techcrunch.com/2011/06/28/google-plus/

http://techcrunch.com/2011/06/29/google-plus-is-actually-pretty-good/

Its still not available for all and is through “invite only” and fortunately, I am Google +’d already 🙂 . I did spend quite some time playing around with it and I can say from the first day experience, it does looks pretty neat and if not better, equally good like FB! I hope that this would not be a bubble only like Buzz or Wave which would get burst in a few days and this time, Google would do it in the right manner, in a manner which would give FB a run for its money!

Tale Of A Long Travel…. June 30, 2011

If you are a traveler, you must be aware about a saying, “this world is a book and if you haven’t traveled , you have just read one page” . But how about when you are doing a little too much of reading 🙂 ? Well, your eyes would start to get hurt ;-). Okay, a not so good joke, never mind, let’s come back to the post. I was going to post this post when I had just reached Banglore but thanks to being tired like dead and a task to complete the book review of my friend’s book, I just couldn’t do it. Anyways, its better late than never, isn’t it! So, I have finally managed to reach Banglore in one piece, without missing any flight and with a smile and satisfaction because I was able to finish my work properly. There is nothing which makes one more happy than seeing his hard work appreciated and seeing a smile on other’s face showing that they were happy and the time that they spent, was worth spending! That’s what I guess I was able to achieve with my last session and not to forget, relived some of the old memories as well! Thanks so much once again to all whom I met there, both the new people and my old mentors!

The toughest part in a travel, if you ask me, is to wait for the flight to arrive sitting in the waiting lounges and if you have to do it, in a single day for 3 times, its just useless to say that it would be tiring! Heck, its VERY tiring actually! And that’s the same happened with me when I was returning back from Singapore this time. The flight of mine was not a direct flight but had a stopover  at Mumbai and from there, after 3 hours, I had a connecting flight to Delhi. Normally, there is a relief that’s there in the mind when I am taking  a return flight that I shall be able to get some rest at the end of the flight but this time, I had , almost about 3 hours of wait to do to catch the next flight of mine to Banglore(where I am right now). And to make matters more worse, my first flight from Singapore was going to start at 7pm but my hotel had the check-out time at 12pm noon. So this means, I had to spend 7 hours some where, anywhere but not in the hotel room of mine. Since I didn’t want to go anywhere, I just decided to come to the airport in a hope that I may get and would be able to catch an early flight. But unfortunately, there wasn’t any other flight and the counter was going to open only at 3pm. So I had nothing else to do except to sit and wait, a tough thing to do especially, when you are all alone. Luckily, my iPod came for my rescue whom I played for all the time. Thanks Steve(Jobs) 🙂 .

When finally the counter did get open, I thought at least I shall be able to get free from my luggage and would be able to eat something(I was starving). But its highly unlikely that when I wish for me something, it actually does get happen. And the same proved to be true this time too, courtesy to the Chinese gal who was managing the airline counter which was saying “Early Check-in”. But seems that that gal was upset over this that she was sent all alone to handle some really eager early-bird passengers to take care and she just decided to take a revenge on all of them by being superb slow, by talking over her cell phone all the time even when she was dealing with the passengers and thus making sure that the others do stand for long time in the queue. You can imagine that how efficient she was from this that  she once torn up the boarding pass of a couple three times. All were getting upset but she seemed to have a deaf ear towards everyone’s hue and cry. Finally, after standing in the queue for about an hour, I got my boarding pass and again,I was now going to wait for the flight to arrive. I had a lot of time to kill and I did that by checking out laptops, finding something to eat(I don’t eat non-veg neither I drink so its tough to find veg food but not so much at Singapore fortunately) and just roaming around. Fortunately, the flight was on time so I didn’t have to wait for any extra time than the required one. The flight was okay and so was the food. I wanted to sleep but there wasn’t any sleep in the eyes. So all I could do was to watch the in-flight entertainment program which was showing movies. And since I was going to use the same airline all the while,I had a good a chance to see almost all the movies which I wanted to see 🙂 . I saw Unknown, Shaolin, Aakrosh, Band Baaja Baarat. I don’t watch movies too often but I guess, it was a good collection and it would had been just great if they could show Kung-Fu Panda 2 as well 😉 . But still, it was not so bad!

Finally, after about 5 hours, I was at Mumbai airport. I am not sure that I do like this place (or may be just the airport of this city) or not. I don’t hate it but its still not one of my first preferences kind of city in any manner. Good thing was, I didn’t have to be there for a long time since after about 3 hours, I was going to Delhi. I did try to change my flight and to go directly from there to Banglore but it didn’t work out. There was no seat in the other flight. So I just had to sit and wait. At about 2:30am, I took my flight from Mumbai to Delhi which did reach at about 4:30 there. And now, I had to take another flight at 7:30am from Delhi to Banglore. If you are still with me, I had been traveling since 12am (means about 9:30am IST) and had already traveled about 8hours in the air. And still, I had almost 3 hours of waiting time and equal amount of air travel ahead before I could finally get some rest. When I was at the check-in counter, the gal at the counter was amazed looking at so many tags on my luggage and when she was about to ask me(possibly) that why so many, I just smiled and said, “there is one more to go”, took my boarding pass and moved towards the departure hall. The good thing was, I was at the 4th best airport in the world and that means, I could get some really good coffee to keep me awake, walk around and take my flight. If you haven’t been to Delhi’s airport, you certainly have missed to see something really good piece of work done, trust me!

Finally, at about 10am IST, I was at Banglore and was praying that I would get the room at the hotel where I stay all the time since they told me that there is no room free. I wasn’t really having any strength and mood to look for another hotel at that time. Fortunately, they did manage to get a room for me and I was just on bed after checking in the room because it was complete 24 hours since I was traveling and I was awake even long before than that. It was really needed otherwise I was going to have a very tough time the next morning since I had a session to start the next day.

Its the 4th day(or night, to be precise) which is almost over now and tomorrow, this session would be over. The delegates are superb, very friendly, very experienced and eager to learn the technology. In short, a perfect mix of all the attributes which make a session transit from a good one to a great one. Hope the last day goes well and I would be able to close it with a smile on my face as well as by bringing it on the face of the delegates too(which is more important). I should now try to get some sleep but I have to still pack my luggage before I can do so though! And I really am not so good in packing luggage if you ask me. Why not somethings are as easy as oracle database, I just wonder some times 🙂 .

Somehow, I Did It…. June 24, 2011

Its Friday but I am still at Singapore, fortunately in the same hotel where I was the entire week. The hotel got a cancellation and didn’t throw me out but gave me an extension today for a day till tomorrow 🙂 . I went to have dinner and tried a new place today as well(have tried one yesterday and did dine at an old place as well). Did buy some chocolates and now, back in the room of mine.

As I mentioned already in an another post, I came to Singapore in 2006 for the first time. At that time, I was totally messed up mentally(just for the record, I still am) or may be I can say that the mental breakdown of mine happened at that time and it hasn’t healed since then. I did get up from a very serious sickness(stayed in the hospital for many weeks) and got an offer to come here. I took the offer to come here to change the environment around me because I was almost dead and if anything could distract me was a place change and loads of work.  And these are the two things that I am doing since then, moving from place to place and working my arse off. I was almost dead once again just few months ago too but like the last time, unfortunately, I again survived. Anyways, these are not important talks since I am going to talk about my visit here neither I am going to mention the reason for me being dead. So as I was saying that I came here for a very important program and this was going to by my first ever international session. I had a lot of experience in delivering sessions within India but hadn’t got a chance to present internationally. The stakes were really high and so was the pressure. I cleared the interview and finally landed up here. I met here the senior manager of delivery who took so much care of me, in fact treated me like a little kid and paid attention to every small detail which could make the difference of heaven and hell in the session. I speak very fast and she made me deliver the session on a weekend just to make sure that I am speaking with the right speed not like a jet. There was another instructor, who had been here from many years and was a very senior guy. He helped me a lot in understanding this place, gave me tips about being here and most needed, assurance that I shall be able to pull it off. Then when I was about to start, there was another instructor who took me along to lunch (its a tradition here to take the entire class with you over lunch for the first day to increase the interaction). I met another instructor whom I was told is a very senior instructor and as like any normal guy, I was just amazed to be with such all big people, I truly was!

The module that I was about to take at that time, it wasn’t new for me but the entire set up that was going to be used by me to deliver it, indeed was and it took me some time to understand it. I did put all of my efforts in the module and managed to pull it very well. I was scared to death that how it would do but fortunately, it did went well. I guess if I can give the credit to my preparation for it, I must give the same to the above mentioned people as well who gave so much confidence to a small town guy like me who was shattered by someone already and was completely down in every aspect. I still use all the tips given at that time in my sessions and just like a proven formula, they work all the time, all thanks to the above people for it!

Time kept on moving with its own pace and I did deliver many modules after it, within India and outside India too. But it didn’t happen that I could come back to this office again. Though I wanted to be here so much but somehow, it just didn’t happen. There were many occasions when it appeared that I shall be coming but it didn’t happen. But last month, there was a requirement and usual what happens with me all the time, I was told that the delegates were going to be very senior and experienced, a statement which is enough to send chills down the spine of any instructor. Well, just like the first time, I again had to appear for an interview which I did clear with good ranking. Still, that interview wasn’t the final test but it was the actual session which was going to be the ultimate test. Well, you got to do what you got to do, no matter how scared you are! So I just pulled my socks and thought will see what will happen and finally, landed here, a place where I came long time back!

There wasn’t much changed I guess. Its the same place and all the rules and regulations were same. Yeah, I have put on some weight and one of the instructors whom I met have shave off his beard now. The another one has left the education industry 🙂 . But other than this, all appeared to be the same. Yeah, there are many new shops which are opened now. Anyways, here I was , at a office where I came so long back and from where I started off the international sessions of mine. It was so good to meet my mentors again though it wasn’t for a long time since all have become even more senior and busy now. But still, it was just great to be with them. The instructor, about whom I was told that he is very senior, was going to attend my session this time. Can you believe it?  I mean what can be more happening for a guy like me to see that such a senior instructor is attending his session. Well, to be honest, as much as it did make me happy, in the same manner it made me nervous as well since it just increased the pressure to even more high level. Well, you got to do what you got to do and that’s what I thought and decided to start off. It was a rather large group compared to the normal number that we get here and all the guys were very senior guys indeed and had a lot of experience, knowledge and willingness to learn. In addition to it, all were so friendly too. There were two Indian guys were too in the session with whom I went to have lunch and both were really really nice! One of the guys daily would ask me that whether I had the breakfast or not and what I am going to do in the evening, where I am going to have dinner and whether I am going to go somewhere or not? He gave me so many tips about many things and also told me that what has changed now here since all the years. He also took me this place Pangat to have lunch which was much better than Komlas where I used to have lunch alone. We did go Komlas too but its quality has become much bad now I guess. So this guy took so much care of me and all I can just say is thanks to him. He is here with his wife and daughter and is planning to come back to India soon. Hope I shall meet him soon again. The other guy has already started the process to come back to India. Anyways, all were so good and friendly and we had some great technical discussions. It was so good to be with all such intelligent folks and share with them the little knowledge of mine about oracle database.

Besides remembering the memories of the office, I also have some other memories over here. I still remember the hotel where I stayed. I called someone on an international call at mid night before I was going to come back to India. I am sure that person must not have any memory of it but I do remember it so well. I remember the place where I used to go and have dinner, a south Indian eating joint whose owner and manager, both were a Punjabi guy and gal. Since I was going to stay at the place which was very close to this, I decided to visit there. When I visited there, I forgot the owner’s name. But I did remember rest all of the things and when I finally met the owner, he was shocked that how the heck I still remember all of it. I even told him that his counter was on the other side than where it is now 🙂 . I also passed by that hotel where I stayed, made the call. Its the same I guess, I wanted to go inside but then didn’t. I had dinner one day at the old place, the subsequent two days at two new places(including today). I am not sure that I was able to spot many changes except some obvious ones but it was good to come back and see all of it again, it really was!

Besides meeting the people from the old time, I also wanted to meet some people whom I came across in the past few years over various channels of oracle world which are, P,  H and M. All are from Singapore only and H and Pbelong to the same club of mine! I could only meet P though and was just able to talk to M and H over phone. But it was still great to meet with Porus and even able to talk to H and C. Hope I shall meet them soon in person as well.

I didn’t go to any place even when I was suggested to go too. Just didn’t have the mood. But I still managed to get a coffee mug for me from Starbucks Coffee. Its actually quite big but I liked the design of it so much! Also I did buy some chocolates for me 🙂 . I am not sure that whether I shall buy something else or not. May be will buy if I shall like something but chances are very less of it if you ask me. Since sis is also at her home now, I don’t have any one for whom I shall go and look for something. But still, I shall still give a final look, just in case that there may be something worthy enough to spend money upon!

It was a good session and since I have just got the rating score as well, I guess I can say it with complete confidence that it went really well! Hope I was able to live up to the hopes of my mentors who were assured that I shall do well and I also hope that I was able to say a thing or two which the delegates had found useful. Its been 5 years since the last when I came to this office and I just hope, the next visit happens much sooner than this! Time to be on the bed now!

Some Amazing Poetic Masterpieces…. June 23, 2011

Those who know me well, are aware about the fact that I absolutely love oracle database and poetry. I am always looking forward to read something new about oracle db and also to read a good poetry that would shake the inner soul of mine completely. If you haven’t done yet, search over this blog for many such poetries that I have put and also some which are written by me as well. Its just amazing that how in just few lines, a lot can be said, isn’t it?

Keeping the trend alive, below are some of those poetries that I absolute love and are among my favorites. These are in Hindi and I shall translate their meaning in English as well. So without further delay, here we go,

(1)Tumse ulfat ke takazay na nibhaye jaate,

Warna humko bhi ye chahat thi ki chahe jaate!

You just couldn’t fulfill the promises of love,
Otherwise I also wished to be loved!

(2)Hum ne aaghosh-e-muhabbat se ye seekha hai sabaq,

Jis ko zinda na rehna ho wo muhabbat kar le!

I have learnt this lesson by the embrace of love,
He who doesn’t want to live, should fall in love!

(3)Ye wafa ki sakht raahein,

Ye tumhare paaon naazuk!

Na lo inteqaam mujhse ,

Yun mere sath sath chal kar!

These tough and painful paths of love,
These delicate feet of yours!
Don’t take revenge from me,
By walking along with me by my side!

(4)Teri bewafai ne chheen li sab shararatein meri,

Aur log samajhtein hai ki sudhar gaya hun main!

Your act of jilt took away all of my smiles and wittiness,
And world think that I have become sensible!

And last one which I think applies over me just perfectly,

(5)Suljha hua sa shaks samajhte hain mujhko log,

Uljha hua sa mujhme koi dusra bhi hai!

People think that I am a very sensible person.
There is someone in me which is just so lost!

If you haven’t got the meaning of these and think that what kind of crap it is, well, don’t bother then trying to understand it too. Some things, for being understood, need a heart, not a “practical”/”logical” mind. If you have understood and liked them, do let me know as well!

HTC Incredible S…. June 23, 2011

This is actually one of the three posts which I have in my draft folder from some time. Since one) I am sitting a little free at the moment in my hotel because its the last day of the session tomorrow and second) I am not sure that I shall be able to write it tomorrow because there is some problem with my booking status at this hotel. It was supposed to be till a certain date but it is getting over tomorrow and now, I am not sure that I shall have an extension because the hotel is completely full. If you haven’t seen me angry and upset, well , then its not possible for you to imagine that how much I can get and how do I look when I am angry so will just say that I am TOO MUCH angry right now. Anyways, will see what will happen tomorrow. At the moment, the post is about the HTC Incredible S, an Android based phone from HTC which I bought few weeks back.

I have an iPod touch which I bought few weeks back. I blogged about it here as well too. Besides that, my sister also has an iPhone with which also I played a lot. So I was not very convinced to spend so much over a phone to be honest. I can spend on a laptop or anything which is worth its cost but on a phone 40k, no , I don’t think so. I had seen the Android phone for the first time when one of my friend VB brought it while visiting to Delhi. I loved the interface and also the integration of it with Google’s ecosystem. But that model, HTC Desire, though being a very good product, was not really a very polished product. So I was waiting for something more better to come out. Then came HTC Desire HD, a better product but the batter life of it was really bad, it sucked completely and horribly! By the time, the dual core phones rumors started to come and it seemed the world is going to go mad about it. Well, I am never a person who goes with the world so I didn’t bother about the rumors actually. Besides HTC, there were(still are) other companies as well which are making Android phones , for example, Samsung is one of the biggest players in the game for it. But I don’t think any other company has the reputation and skills that HTC has to make a phone simply because that’s the only thing HTC has done so far since its inception I believe. Anyways, I did a lot of research and after the result, I totally discarded Samsung. It was now to decide which model of HTC to buy and the trouble was, HTC hadn’t still launched a dual core phone.

Despite that I waited for a long time, it still didn’t happen that there came any news of HTC launching a dual core phone. After a long delay, they finally announced HTC Sensation but again the trouble was that there wasn’t any confirmed date for its launch in India. Its launched now at India just in case if you are planning to buy it from India. But I didn’t want to buy it actually because this is the first of the models from HTC in dual core and I would buy such product once it is made more mature by HTC. So after a LOT of research over Google, reading many reviews, discussions , in short, in the same manner in which I do everything, with a very deep thought, I finally decided to go with Incredible S and I am glad that I made the right decision. The phone is an awesome piece of technology and it has got very high rankings from all the websites around the world. There is no battery problems that I have seen in it. The screen size(4”) is perfect and it is also now upgraded to Android(2.3) aka Gingerbread. I don’t spend my money so easily and I am glad that I did spend over it.

There are many reviews of it available on Google(search htc  incredible s over Google). I liked the review of Hemorrdroids.net quite a lot so here is the link for it for you to read,

http://hemorrdroids.net/htc-incredible-s-review/

And here are the two official videos of it from HTC,

I shall conclude by saying this that if you are planning to buy an Android phone, do NOT buy a cheap one. Spend some money and buy a good one only and if possible, do some research before finally getting one. My vote would be going to HTC only but your choice may vary but nonetheless, at least in phones, Android is kicking Apple’s arse quite a lot so  it at least deserves a careful thought if you are planning to buy a smartphone which is truly smart! And what else an incredible Aman could get than the Incredible itself isn’t it LOL ?

A Wish Which Would Remain Unfulfilled…. June 21, 2011

I just read this below statement and needless to mention, I truly loved it. The only sad part is, its far away from becoming true ever and to be honest, I really am not holding my breath for it to come true as well. But still liked it so much,

Sometimes when I say "I’m okay", I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight, and say, "I know you’re not."

Hello From Singapore…. June 21, 2011

Yes, I am at Singapore. Its been a while since I have come to this office where I am sitting right now, Suntec Tower 4. The last time when I came here was in 2006. That was the first time when I came overseas for delivering a training program and this time again, the reason is same. Its so good to be back here and meet few persons whom I had met long time back and who actually taught me the few of the first lessons about the tactics of delivering a sessions.

The session which I am handling right now is a VERY tough one and I am trying my best to keep things running smoothly. Hope all remains and goes fine. Its time to go for lunch. Been very long that I have seen food courts here at Suntec. Hope will find something to eat 🙂 .

Tons Of Things And So Less Time, Life At Times Is So Hard…. June 18, 2011

Yes, that’s a truth. Its been tons of things that I have just done in these last two days of mine and still, the list of things is not finished. And to make things more spicy, I am going overseas for a very tough module for which I have done a lot of preparation but still, the heart is beating so much fast because I am aware both about the complexity of the module and the mandatory condition that I must perform well, if not in the best manner, in it. Whether I shall be able to do so or not, I am not sure.

Last week session of mine was a very pleasant experience. There were just four delegates, three guys and one gal but all of them were very friendly and eager to learn the technology of which I was taking the session. One delegate out of four was very witty and he did bring so many moments in the sessions which brought not just smiles but laughter on the faces of all of us. There was one particular thing that he was really interested or was mentioning about, about my wedding 🙂 . I guess since I did speak about Oracle and the related people to it a lot so much that it left an expression that this is the only thing that I do(which is not true at all) and I probably haven’t ever fallen in love with a gal other than falling in love with oracle db! I maintain a very strict distance with the delegates when I am in the session so I didn’t answer any such questions and dodged them with my signature style, with a smile 🙂 . But still, I had a very great time and the delegates gave me so much of respect and honor. One delegate brought a chocolate for me and on the last day and another went completely out of the way to drop me at an office from where I had to collect my passport for an upcoming travel. It was raining so much but still, she and her husband dropped me right on the spot. We all went outside to lunch thrice and it was a great fun. Overall, it was a very nice time that I spent with the delegates and I am happy that I could share with them whatever little I know about oracle db. Though I am not really happy with the rating that I  have received and I am not sure the reason of it but still, I am very thankful to the guys for their respect and friendliness and I hope that I was able to tell them a thing or two and make their time and money spent worthwhile. Thanks a bunch guys and I hope I shall meet you all soon.

I have spent the entire day today and the yesterday’s night in the preparation of the module that I am going to handle now. There is a huge pressure on me about me and you can imagine from this that I am very tensed about it since the moment I have to come to know about the complexities involved in it. I hope that all would go fine but I am not sure about it. Why? Well call me stupid but even before I have started for it, there are troubles coming up in it and that’s what is making me so tensed and nervous, not a good thing to see happening if you ask me!

I need to wake up really early tomorrow so I shall try to have a nap if possible now. Its going to be a long tour and its going to be a really tough week coming ahead. There are tons of things that I need to finish as I said already above and I really have no idea how I shall finish them all. Life is indeed so hard at times and with me, I guess most of the times!

Yet Another Poetic Try…. June 17, 2011

I am not a poet, never claimed to be one and probably, never will be one either. Whenever I have tried to write something poetic(here , here, here,here,here and here) , I have mentioned it that don’t expect that I shall be writing a masterpiece in poetry. Still, at times, when some thoughts, pains of some wounds given over soul rise their head, one does attempts to do many things. Some die(some try doing it but not sure why their wish of going away doesn’t get fulfilled) , some get themselves buried under work and some, along with burying themselves into work, do give a try to write some words even. Irony is that those who give such wounds, such pains to their beloved ones . This is the reason for these write up to originate, at least in my case. If you think that they are a complete shame to poetry, well, there you go. I have been warning you all the time that don’t expect Shakespear or Ghalib writing here. So with the fair warning, here is one another write up that came up after giving the answer of a question, which is asked very often. Its in Hindi and I shall put together it in English as well. And here it is,

Aaj phir jab poochi gayi mujhse mere hasi ki wajah,

Aaj phir maine wohi jhooth dohraya, main khush hoon!

And its translation in English is,

Today when again I was asked the reason of my smiles,

Today again I repeated the same lie, I am happy!

Smiles, how unimportantly we treat them isn’t it? And how easily we assume that how come our smiles can go away or can be replaced by tears when we ourselves haven’t done this with anyone and/or given the same tears to anyone? Just how wrong we are in thinking like this! Its a wrong assumption to make and we are proved wrong because we forget that this current world of ours is a “practical” world and the people of this current world are “practical” people who won’t bother about such an unimportant matter that how someone would feel if they would hurt him if doing so is better for them and would be helpful in getting their wishes complete and dreams come true.Surely enough, these things are far more important and worth to worry about than bothering about someone being hurt and/or being in tears! “I need to be selfish sorry” that’s all what they say and its true too because if one won’t be, it would be tough to make the dreams of a good career, study at abroad a reality and they would remain unfulfilled. It must not be forgotten that in the practical world like ours, when it comes to decide using heart and brain, the decision is taken by the later because that’s what decides the pro’s and con’s and in a practical world, while taking practical decisions, that’s what is most important! Thinking from heart is only for idiots who bother about nothing and will refuse to see anything beyond their beloved ones only to realize that in this practical world, its something on which people just laugh about. All what matters is to ensure that all the wishes like a good career, study in abroad, a better life, must see the sunshine and if in doing so, one has to break someone completely and even fill heart their with pains, cries and eyes with tears, its completely worth it!

May be its just perfectly okay to do whatever it takes to get your dreams. May be, even this is completely justifiable to give never healing pain, eyes filled with just tears and life long cries to someone(anyone) if that person is coming in the way of getting those dreams come true. But what is not right is doing so without even bothering that what it would do to that other person? Its not right to not even pause and think for a moment that how deeply doing so would hurt him and in how many millions of pieces, not just the heart but the soul also would be shattered! How these pieces of one’s own inner self would pierce him and bleed him to death with every coming breath, its not something that one can just imagine and understand,  you must be that dead person to understand the agony of it! Its okay to give tears to someone but how those tears drop along the cheeks of someone, how tough and painful it is to sit on cold floor in your room’s corner, on the bench of a lonely park, just by yourself and cry hiding your face with your hands and trying hard that no one should hear your cries or see your tears, to understand it, one needs to be that unfortunate soul who has to face this punishment! Those who give tears to their beloved one and yet dare to say when see them crying that “I have nothing to do with your tears and you”, they won’t ever understand that what those tears and pain tastes like? How tough it is to face people the next morning with your eyes red and swollen after spending the entire night drowned in the pool of your own tears, is not something that is expressible through words. And when all of a sudden, someone throws a question to your face after seeing your red eyes that “what happened”, you just put a fake smile and say, “nothing, just some late night work/movie/party/whatever”  when in reality, its because of the tears gifted by none other than someone for whom and for every smile and happiness of that person, you tried with the bestest efforts of yours. With each breath and heartbeat of your, you wished from god to take away even your own happiness and smiles and put them in her lap. But still, all you get to hear that you just did everything for your own self! When one crosses oceans, travels thousands of miles to see someone and is told that you have just caused trouble, when you sit in a room all alone for days , not once but twice and you are told that you did all just because only you wanted to do it, how does that feels, its not possible to be understood unless you are the one who heard all this. And when on one day, when you decide to die once and for all,are on the verge of death and yet when one says, ”I didn’t ask you to do so, I have nothing to do with it” , forgetting that there must be something that must have hurt so much that one did decide to die finally than staying alive and yet being dead, to understand it, you must be the person who decides to go far away from this world. You choose to do so because you are not the right fit for this world by being so“impractical”, “illogical”, being one who just knows that not everything gets decided by mind but some things are just driven by heart.

I wrote this post Just Awesome some time back and  mentioned in it just a single line of poetry. I guess it says it all that it may take a lot to do get your dreams come true of study in abroad, a better life and a career but it takes, if not more, the same amount of courage and effort to put them behind for a smile, for someone’s happiness and love. It takes nothing to opt for a better career option but to tear apart an offer letter for a promise given, may be, it won’t take a lot but at least it takes a heart (or an idiot mind) which won’t agree to see anything beyond a smile and a shine in the eyes! But it seems, this all is something which has no importance or worth in a practical world like of today, a sad but a true fact which it is indeed!

I shall conclude by putting another poetic masterpiece here which is not from me but from the master himself, Ahmed Faraz. The below depict so nicely the pain of a person who got this gift from no one else but his beloved and/or nears and dears!

Shiddatt-e-ghum se sharminda nahin hai meri wafa Faraz,

Jab dost gehre hon to jakhm bhi gehre mila karte hain!

And it’s translation in English is,

My love is not regretting the intensity of pain,

When friends are so dear, the wounds given by them would also be so deep!

The only irony is, even when the eyes are filled with tears, soul with wounds and mind with anger, stupid heart still refuses to believe that this all is a gift of someone who promised not to hurt you ever but as the well known saying goes,A promise is a comfort for a fool.So true isn’t it!

Is It Really True…. June 15, 2011

I have got this text just now which had this below statement,

A boy becomes valuable when a girl drops a tear for him, and a girl is priceless when a boy drops a tear for her.

Is it really true? If yes than what about when even after seeing tears, one gets to hear, “ I have nothing to do with these tears? May be some drops of tears have really no importance neither does those eyes who have them or may be, what I remembered reading long time back is more true than the above statement,

Saathi jag te sab jiondian de, koi raahi na jag to challeyan da!

Sach sayane keh gaye ne, hassa sarian de rona kalleyan da!

And its translation in English is,

All are companions of alive, no one is going to accompany those who are fleeing the world!

Its a wise thing said by someone, laughter is for all but cries and tears are just of your own!

Isn’t it?