Aman's Blog….ANYTHING goes here!

I was just so much upset when the following came in to my inbox and I must say,it did make me smile. I found them really good so thought would share it with you. Have a read,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So how was is it? Do let me know if you liked it and also, how do you get the “fight started”  😉 ?

 

 

Yes I am back today. It was a LONG tour as I normally go for a 5 day schedule but this time the schedule grew to 8 days and there was 1 more day added to that because I had to travel on my way back to see a friend who just got married. Besides that long number of days, I was supposed to handle three different modules this time in front of very talented bunch of delegates which is adequate enough to make one feel nervous. But at the end of the program(s) , all were smiling and that’s a sign that things did go “okay” :-).

 

The start of the tour was not very much hectic as I was not supposed to take a flight this time. I was going to Gurgaon this time which is just next city after New Delhi where I go all the time over bus. The same was true this time too that I took bus from my place and headed for New Dellhi. From there, I had to take a cab which would had taken me to the client’s guest house. I was given a room which otherwise was okay except just one thing that it had a single bed to sleep which I never am comfortable sleeping upon and 2nd ( and I guess, a bit more important) , it had no television :-). Yes, tv was in common room where I certainly could go and see it but the issue as its the cricket mania going on over here in India for the Indian Premier League(IPL) so I thought it would be a little hard to ask people to switch it off and let me watch stuff of my choice and that too when I would had been the only asking to “not to” watch cricket :-). So I just chose to stay in my room after the session, a good choice which I think now I made as I was getting extremely tired after the sessions, that much tired that I would just come back and would go to bed immediately before I go for dinner! So it also was fine that there was no tv in my room as it would had just distracted me.

 

Delegates were just so nice and lively! Its always rewarding when you get a chance to share thoughts with people who really are listening to you very carefully and are willing to even share their thoughts about the same topic. It was a good discussion that did happen in all the 3 modules , especially one over the last module where we had a talk about the usage of Materialized Views. No , its not the way to look at the materialistic things but its an object used in Warehouse Databases. It was a good discussion that did happen for this topic, I certainly can say that I did enjoy that discussion. Though, in the end , there were couple of good comments which delegates said to me but for me , one comment stood apart from all which I guess am really not worthy off but still , I am really grateful that a very senior person thought like that for me and said it in front of all. What did happen that in between of my sessions, I do share couple of external web addresses which I feel can be helpful for the delegates for learning and exploring the stuff which is there in the book. I always feel that the best way to learn and to make people knowledgeable about the stuff is not just to explain them what’s in there in the book/material which they already have in their hand but also to tell what are the other places where more information about the same topic is available. Learning is sharing and sharing is learning, that’s what I believe in! So as like all the times, I did share couple of book titles , web addresses this time too , surely enough, also did talk about the people whose websites/ blogs I was sharing. So when I was talking about a website, a delegate who himself is a very senior developer and a senior manager by designation said, one day people would talk like the same about you too Aman! WOW! Now that’s some thing which I guess, is one of the best comments I have heard so far for me. Just for the record, I am not at all worthy enough to be even thought like that, let alone about getting a public comment like that but still, I just say my heartiest thanks and appreciate it that that delegate did think of me so highly and said this much about me in between the session. I know nothing and for a guy who doesn’t know anything, this comment means a lot, I mean it!

 

So finally, after a long but exciting tour, I am back home. I guess, this should have made clear about the “smiles” which is a part of the title of this post. So what about the “but”? Well, there are certain things which are very much wrong that are happening in the family. Those are making me so much upset, worried and to be honest, scared too! So though that I am happy that the tour did went well, I am still not able to smile the way I should be doing! I just hope that nothing wrong does happen and everything would just get fine as soon as possible. And this must happen as early as possible as the more delay would happen for it, the more worse impact it would have over all in the family. I am off to bed now as my eyes are burning because of not sleeping. Tomorrow, I need to go and see a colleague of mine for some official work and it would certainly not look nice if I would sleep in between of the meeting 🙂 . So time now to close eyes and at least try to sleep. Hope sleep too does find its way towards my eyes.

I am sure you must have understood from the post title by now, what’s it going to be about 🙂 . Yes, I am leaving tomorrow morning. Its going to be a long tour this time , not so much long but still more longer than the usual ones with one more challenge that I shall be covering three different modules at one single place and that too for a single client. Let’s see how things would go? I won’t be going much far from home this time, okay, technically, I shall still be far but I don’t consider that place far from where I can travel to and from via a bus/train. Only when I need to catch a flight , its far for me. Anyway, let’s see what happens with the program. Besides this, there is another thing that is a small issue at the moment, that is that my phone is not working! And trust me, that’s a BIG issue when you are traveling. I haven’t done much work since I came back from my last tour. Though I thought that I would do start a very important thing, it didn’t happen the way I planned. I did start it but I guess, I have wasted more time than I have actually utilized. That’s a very severe wrong thing and now the pressure is over me to finish it up as soon as possible, for which I shall try my best. So to sum up, there is enough stuff  to keep me over my toes. Hope everything goes fine. Pray for me guys, as like always, they are so important for me and I need them so much!

At times, you come across certain things which just shake you apart. You never knew about them before but when you know about them, all you can do is just say thanks to the god that you did get face to face with them. If you are a regular here, you may already be knowing that I love music and its very rare that I miss a good piece of music. But at times, it happens, due to my so much busy schedules, I don’t get time to search and listen some of them. Though it does happen very rare but yes, it still does happen. And if you have been a regular here , you must be knowing already, I love to hear those songs which have meaning, which depict emotions as I believe, emotions are the only thing which make us a human, otherwise we are just as like that beast who have a body, hunger, who lives and dies. Its the emotions which makes a living person, a human and out of so many emotions in this world, the most soul touching emotion is of pain, sadness. No one in this world can say that he/she has not tasted this emotion. There may be many who would tell that they have never become happy, but no one, as much I can think of, can claim that he/she was never ever sad. And when we are talking about sadness and pain, there is no deeper pain than the pains which one gets in love and that too, from none else but from his own love! Yes, it takes a life time and even more to get the wounds of the soul healed which are caused by the broken pieces of the heart. Those who do it, they never care about this, they never bother about these wounds. They just remain busy with what ever they were doing before, thinking that they have not done anything at all or worse, come up with some excuses/logics/explanations to justify the pains given by them only but that doesn’t do anything good for those who have got their hearts broken and their eyes filled with just tears , thanks entirely to their loved ones! When this happens, all one is having is just questions whose answers he/she seeks from all but alas, no one has them! You just sit and think what was so wrong that I did that I had to face all this, what was left missing in my love that I had got tears in reward for being in love. When you ask someone , all they say, you don’t know how to love , there must be some thing that you have done wrong , not knowing that at times , even when you give your everything in love, it doesn’t get counted at all and is called stupidity. Yet you do this, not because that you want some thing by doing this but all you can see while even getting your head slayed on the road , is just the face of your love, that smile which is precious more than anything in this world! You do all what you can do and even more than that too, for that someone special with just one wish, just one small wish that at least she would understand this, care about it, embrace it in her heart! When no one else can see your tears and keeps on hurting you, you still don’t mind because you know, that some one special will wipe all of them with her hands, will make you smile, will hold you tight in that hug which is incomparable to anything else in the world. Yes, you do feel all this! But when that some one special only breaks that very heart of yours which you had given to her already, when instead of wiping tears from the eyes, she gets them filled with the same for the rest of the life, all you do is just ask yourself, how could it happen? What was so wrong that you did that you have got this much severe punishment? Is wishing for just one smile is such a big crime that for this, tears, cries and pains are supposed to be given for the rest of the life? You wish to die but even that does play with you. You are forced to live yet to die with every breath! All you do is just ask that why did it happen with you, a question whose answer is no where!

 

It is said that emotions can’t be seen. True, but that’s the time when words come and become the face of those emotions. And when words get combined with a voice which depicts the pain of those words, combined with the music, a gem gets prepared! The following song is like this only. Declan Galbraith is one of those very few souls who are blessed by God himself and have got a divine voice! If you haven’t heard him yet, you haven’t heard music at all, too big statement to make but yes, its true! He started singing from a very very young age and even now, when he is not a kid anymore,  his voice is just getting more and more better! This song that I going to post here, is the song which depicts the emotions of a guy whose beloved cheated on him and went to some one else, leaving him asking just the question that how could it happen, how could some one break his heart?  I wasn’t able to search an official video for it(yet) so I am posting a made-up video. Here it is,

 

 

And here are the lyrics of this song which are in English,

 

 

 

How could an angel break my heart!!

 

 

 

Why didn’t she catch my falling star?
I wish I didn’t wish so hard,
Maybe I wish our love apart!
How could an angel break my heart!!

 

 

 

I shall conclude by saying this only that if you can’t give smiles to some one, you have got no rights to give him/her tears too! It takes a life time for the wounds of broken heart to get healed. It is said that time heals the wounds but even time too can’t vanish the signs of those. If some one loves you, do take care of that loving heart, make sure you do anything but not let that heart be broken! If it would get broken, surely it would hurt that person but some where , you are breaking some thing which is  just keeping you safe and secure from all! Don’t break that very heart which has nothing but love just for you. Its not every day that love comes to one and its not every day when someone sheds tears for your tears and smiles for your smiles. Don’t give tears to those eyes for whom world is limited to your face,to  your existence as if you are there and smiling then only this world exists and is a heaven, if you are not or are sad, there is nothing which is good! Don’t give pain to those who always stand to take your pains away. Its very easy to break someone’s heart and than say a “sorry”. But remember, if sorry would had been able to heal broken hearts, no lover would had died in this world, no eye would had tears in it ever! If you have some one who loves you so much, treasure him/her more than anything else because every thing else is possible to be achieved  in this world, but to make some one love you from the core of his heart and soul,  for this, there is still no methodology available and neither would ever be as it just happens! You may be able to get the most precious things of this world, earn the biggest wealths but its not every day, some one would love you truly! You can achieve anything in this world, a good job, a good study in abroad, a good career and life but may not some one who would be the happiest one in this world to see you achieving all this! Don’t give tears to those eyes who see happiness in your smile only! Love is the most beautiful gift that one can have in his life, let it be like that only, don’t make it the biggest pain that one has to carry for the rest of his/her life.

It was just one of the most sad days for me. If you have read the immediate last post, I did mention there that I am not feeling happy even when I had bought some new stuff for me and like a chain-reaction, another blow came up and that too so soon and in the same day! I won’t mention the whole detail here but just would say this much,how would it feel when a kid would give up his meal to make sure that his dad/mom would their? No matter how old your kid may become, you would never want him/her to suffer even the slightest one, you would always want that he/she must be always happy and smiling , doesn’t matter for this, you have to face what kind of times? I don’t have kids( I am not married) but still, I did feel the same today, felt the same kind of pain today. And needless to say, that did hurt me so much! Already, I was not feeling good , the event which happened, proved to be the final blow to knock me off.

 

With this immense feeling of sadness, I am also so much upset. Over whom/what? Well, I won’t give the answer of this but yes, I really am upset and its certainly not good when you are sad and upset together, atleast not for me!

Its been many years since I have gone and bought some thing for me. Don’t ask me the reason for it as I won’t mention it here. Despite that my mom and sis has mentioned this so many times that I must go and buy some stuff for me as well, I haven’t done so. Needless, they are never happy from me doing this. But today, I had to go and get some stuff for me because of the trip that’s coming next for me. This is going to be a longer-than-normal trip so I ran out of the required number of clothes. Well, I shall be honest, its always good to get some thing for yourself, its always a great feeling. I am a very fussy customer and it takes a long time for me to get stable on one particular piece which finally comes back with to home. Anyways, so when it was decided that I am going today and won’t be coming back without getting at least one shirt , I had to look for the place from where I would buy my stuff. Among many stores in my city, there is one which is quite good, Bombay Store(full site coming up soon). Me and almost all of my friends , mostly visit there only to get clothes for us and today was just one more repetition of the same trend. It didn’t take me much long to settle upon a Zodiac shirt and one Alvaro tie. The sales guy pushed me a lot to get one more shirt along with a trouser but poor fellow didn’t know that even this much what I had bought, wouldn’t have happened if I wasn’t in a desperate need 😉 . Finally with this much of shopping(if it does qualify to be called so), I was back home!

 

I am carrying a normal laptop bag with me. Now , normally this shouldn’t be a problem( stress on “normal”) but the issue, here its again I am involved, so there is bound to be some issue 🙂 . So I was saying that normally , the bag which I have, shouldn’t be a problem for any one but the issue , I have stuffed it more than it can actually take up with lots of papers, notebooks, few pens and gazillion things like that. And it has a genuine issue as well, at times, its holding belt comes out on its own, creating a huge risk for the notebook. So I had to change it and surely enough, I wouldn’t go for a normal bag this time. So with lots of research, I figured out a backpack for me, which I thought would be good enough, robust yet designer enough to suit my needs, MAXXUM by Swiss Gear. Please note that this is about 2 months old story. So when I was sure that this is the back pack that I want, I had to order it. My friend Amandeep, who is in London, told me that let the bag be delivered to him and he would send it through some one who would be coming to India and with this, at least we can save the shipping cost. Not a bad idea, so finally the bag got delivered to his place. Now a slight change in the plan came when almost three months, no one actually visited India. And to make things more interesting, the zippers of my bag stopped working :-). So now, the backpack became a necessity. Because there was no information when someone would come and bring the backpack for me, I was planning to get my old bag repaired today and use the same for the next tour. But before I would had done that, I got message from Amandeep that my bag has been sent and is there in my city. Good, so all I had to do was to go and get it. I went to that guy’s home who carried my bag back home. Well, I was happy until I saw it. Rest everything was fine except stitch on one of the back straps was broken. It was not a manufacturing defect but it happened because Amandeep , while sending it , filled it way too much which caused the stitch to be broken. Honestly, I didn’t like it as now I have to take it for some “manual repair” which I am not sure how would go? Let’s see, I may post an update later on about it. In the meanwhile, if you are also interested in buying a backpack and looking for some advice, I would suggest to read this review about MAXXUM, which IMHO, is the best one,

 

 

Okay so all said and done,I am sure you must be thinking , this all doesn’t give any clue about the title of the post. Yes it doesn’t and I know that. Despite that I have gone for a shopping, got a new backpack, I am not sure that why I am still not feeling happy as I should be or normally I am when I get something new. I don’t the reason for it but only thing that I am feeling is that I shouldn’t have gone for anything from above mentioned. Weird, you must say, yes I know it is and I too, don’t know what’s the reason for this kind of feeling. May be I need to go on the tour now, change of place and with lots of work around, may help!

 

 

As I mentioned , I did go to the factory where the backpacks are manufactured and repaired. The guy over there took the bag and restich the part from the straps from where the thread was coming out. I must say, its not as like the original stitch but , it would take a very close eye to find the difference too! Is it okay for me now? I guess, its not irritating me now as it was doing before because when ever I was seeing that opened thread , I was getting so much upset. In that sense, yes its much better. But still, the feeling that I got a new bag repaired is still there and I really doubt it would go away with such an ease. And I have no idea either how would I cope up with that feeling too? But for the moment, the backpack is back in the business!

 

I have been lucky ( so far) that I didn’t come across anything in my life that I had to stay at the hospital. Yes I do get lots of injuries and I meet with accidents almost all the time, but still, thanks to god, so far I have just gone to hospitals to get the treatment and later , would just come back home. I have not met anything that serious with me that I had to get admitted over there. Yes, few months back, when my dad with an accident from which he is still recovering, I spent almost 20 days there at the hospital. And that was the first time, when I had spent such a long tenure over, enough to make me believe more and more that a person must never should see the face of this building called hospital.

 

At times, even when you don’t want some thing to happen with even your worst enemy too, it does get happen with some one near to you. And at times, things happen all of a sudden. The same kind of thing happened two days back when two of my very good friends, Amit and Sumit got food poisoning( which turned out later much worse than that) and had to get admitted in the hospital. I came to know about this one day later as they got admitted in the night only. Both of them helped me so much when dad was there in the hospital and both are very close friends of mine, so hearing this that both have been admitted to the hospital was enough to shake me up. I rushed towards the hospital where they both were admitted. Upon reaching there I came to know that Amit is in the same hospital but Sumit has been referred to another hospital and is in the Intensive Care Unit(Surgical) because his condition had become much worse and doctors of the hospital where he was brought first had gave up on him. You must be thinking that what’s so severe happened with them that things became so worst? Yes that was the same question which was boggling my mind all the time. And I couldn’t believe when I heard the reason of all this mess. Both , Amit and Sumit , while returning from their office, thought that they would had a glass of juice and stopped on the way at a juice shop. God only knows what occurred to their mind that they changed their mind to have “vegetable juice”. Yes vegetable juice, you heard it right! According to Amit , as he was the only one who was able to talk from both of them, when they had the first sip of their juice, it was very sour but they didn’t bother and finished the entire juice in a single breath. It took not even 10 minutes when they came back home that they had vomits started. It was so severe that both couldn’t even get up from their bed. Later, doctors told that they had consumed some thing very poisonous which made their condition so worse. Yesterday, Amit got the discharge from the hospital and I brought him back to home. Sumit is still in the hospital, in the ICU on oxygen. According to doctors, he would be brought out of emergency may be by today evening. I couldn’t go to the hospital today as I myself is not feeling well. I just hope that Sumit would be fine and would come back to a normal room today.

 

When I went to see Sumit, there was a family whose father was admitted in the ICU unit. The condition of him was very serious and there were almost 8 people from the ICU team were standing around him. I was told that he was operated just one night prior and now his condition is getting more and more unstable. His son was standing and watching all these medical people yelling for medicines , ventilator and god knows what. After some time, he just turned his back from all and was crying. I believe he had either his friend or some cousin brother with him who came and immediately hugged him. Than they both went inside again and started talking to doctors. That guy was constantly shouting so loudly, and was saying to his dad that he must keep his eyes open and not to close them at all. Listening and seeing all this, brought tears in my eyes. I was shaken like anything and I was just praying that old man must be fine, at least for some more time. I had to come back to see Amit so I left from there. I don’t know what happened to that guy but I just hope that he survived and is with his family. I talked to that guy for a very short while as he called me to help him to get his father sit down. At that time only he told me that his father got operated and still, there is nothing that can be said for sure. All I could say was that everything would be fine and I really hope that the same must have happened.

 

Every time when I go to hospital, I realize one thing again and again and more firmly, we do so many cheating’s, tell so many lies, hurt so many people for nothing. All this what we do is for happiness that won’t go with us, it will all stay here only. It just takes a moment and all what we have achieved , earned, it just get separated from us and our eyes get closed. Than what for we do all these bad deeds? Why do we hurt others to get happiness when we can’t take that happiness with us anywhere? Why do we hurt our loved ones for the sake of those gains which actually would just stay here and would not mean anything when we won’t be anymore? What’s so much more important is to earn love, blessings from others because only these would go with us. Life is the biggest illusion than why we always strive to make it more fancier by cheating others to get profits for us? I guess, the more early we understand this, the more better we would be. Some one said very truly, “Jag jiondeyan de mele” meaning, this world is happy fair only when we are alive, how so true isn’t it?

Its Baisakhi today, which brings the start of a new year for Punjab. You can read more about Baisakhi from here and here. This is the most awaited festivals in Punjab as up till this time, the harvesting of the crops is over. This makes farmers free and as they have just sold their crop in the market, their pockets are also full. So this day is celebrated both to celebrate the success of the last year and to pray and hope that the next incoming year would also go just as great as this was. As this day starts a new year according to Indian calendar, this means in one way or the other, in entire India, this day is celebrated , may be with different names but the spirit and the joys are same all over. I wish you all a very happy and prosperous Baisakhi. Celebrate this day with lots of happiness and joy with your family and friends and may god bring you so much of success in this year as well. Happy Baisakhi to all of you!

 

 

 

Its been almost a week since I have come here and I didn’t write anything. I should actually say , I couldn’t write anything because it was not due to me that there was no update but it was because of the low or we can say, almost no internet connectivity and constant power failures that were there. Today, finally I got shifted to that service apartment where I stay all the time and which is perfect in everything and so I got the connectivity back. Why I didn’t come here before? Well, again it was not my fault , this apartment was completely packed with the guests so I was shifted to another apartment, needless to say that the other one was really worse. So when the people of this apartment came to know about my issues with almost everyone in that other apartment, I was immediately shifted back here.

 

This time, there was nothing which I can say , was exceptional or adventurous which did happen in my travel. In fact, it was very boring. I got the bus as usual from the bus stand which is near to my home. I expected to be there at Delhi by 2.30 and guess what, I was right there at 2.30 only :-). Now that’s what is called planning or timing isn’t it? Over the airport too, there was nothing special. I had my check in done and when I saw the watch, it was still 3 hours left for my left. So what you do when you got so much time left for your flight and you are alone, you get some thing to eat and start reading something, at least I do it. So I bought momos and started reading about, any guesses, Oracle’s read consistency mechanism. It was almost an hour left for my flight when I finished reading about it and than was just sitting and watching people. I have been traveling from so long and one thing have always hurt me. It was never that I had anyone who would had come to welcome me over my arrival. Okay, to be honest, I do get my cab driver all the time at least one place to welcome me but that’s really not very exciting isn’t it. And I never traelled with somone else too. So why I am mentioning all this now?  Where I was sitting, there was a couple sitting in front of me. I must say, the gal was so much in love with the guy as she was taking so much of care of him. I believe that there were married but that doesn’t make much difference as what was most important was the love that was there was clearly visible, between them. There are some people still in this world I guess, for whom, love really does matter and so do their loved ones.

 

About the tour, its going on. I am handling two modules this time. One session is already over and thank god, it went well. Let’s see what would happen for the 2nd one. The delegates are very nice( as like always) and because of them, entire session has become very interesting. I hope that all goes well tomorrow with it. Let’s see what happens. Now I have to have to my dinner, and I must say, its been many days that I had a good dinner so I am really looking forward for my dinner today 🙂 .