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Wishes, Choices & Love…. June 13, 2008

Posted by Aman.... in Random Stuff.
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Life is full of wishes. We have lots of dreams and for all of them, we make lots of wishes. Some times those things come to us which we had always wished and some times , those things come to us which we had never wished to have in our wildest dreams even. But despite for few times when we don’t get what we wish,we never give up.  As wishes are and will be always there in our lives. They make humans! If they are not any , one still must zero upon few wishes, Where he wants to be in his life, what he wants to achieve! If one doesn’t have these things in his mind, he should sit and think about all these things. After all we have got just one life and we must make sure that in this very life only , we do accomplish all that what we ever wished!
Just like wishes, we also have choices. Choice like either to pick right things or to go for wrong ones. Choice to make some one happy or give him tears. Choices to take away everything from some one and still call him selfish! Choice that either we  sacrifice what ever little we ever had
for someone’s one smile even or to make that person sacrifice himself only to get our one smile!Yes choices for whom no one else but only we are responsible,not once or twice but always! Choices are linked with wishes too. Its certainly possible that what one had wished in the past,now to get that, to make that wish come true, he now has to make a choice in the present. We all do that isn’t it? All the time, right from our childhood, we do one thing or the other to get
what we want! And we are never happy when we don’t get or can’t get what we really wished for!
Choices and wishes are very integral part of our lives.  But there is one more thing that is also very integral in our lives. Some thing which makes a human a human, some thing which makes this heart a “heart”, some thing which comes by luck only but stays only with efforts.  I am sure you have guessed it up til now.  Yes that is love! Yes among lots of other wishes, I guess most of us do wish for a partner too who would love us beyond any limits, be with us till the eternity. A partner who when smiles,,make us smile , whose tears make us cry too, who would stand with us in all the times, good or bad, happy or sad! And a partner with whom we want to spend our entire life with, call him just ours and of no one else! Among all the sweet feelings in this world who touch heart, love is the sweetest and among all the persons whom we had or we ever are going to meet in this very life, that one person will always be most special whom we call our beloved, whom we say ( and love to hear back all the times) , I love you!Yes love is the sweetest feeling in this world and forever will be but we forget one thing that love has to share space
with our immense wishes!

Wishes are very important and depending on the age, time, every wish for every human being can be really very important. For a child, getting a toy gun or a barbie doll can be as important as for a teenager to have 200cc sports bike or for an aspiring model to win Miss Universe contest or food for that person who is hungry from several days! Yes our lives are full of wishes and we only decide what is important for us, which wish is more important to us at what time/age/circumstance! Is there anything wrong in it? No, there is nothing wrong in doing this. What kind of wish it would be when its not important for us? Yes wishes are and should be important in our lives and we have all of this world’s rights to decide what’s important for us and what’s not. There is no issue or complexity in this belief till the time one thing doesn’t come along  and cross paths with wishes,love.
When love comes in a person’s life, lots of things change. Apart from long sleepless nights and an immense satisfaction that now finally we have some one who is just ours,there also comes ( should come) a feeling of responsibility, an unsaid promise that no matter what happens, we will always be there with our love, we will always hold his/her hands and wipe his/her tears,share his happiness. There is no need to explicitly make this promise. All things doesn’t need to be said and told and so is this promise! Love is not just making phone calls or having meals together or going to movies or giving roses on every other day. Love is much more than all of this. Love means a promise to take care of your beloved when he/she needs you, stand by his/her side when he/she needs support and no one is ready to be with him/her, love is to make sure that no matter what happens , you are always going to fill your beloved’s lap with this whole world’s smiles and happiness and love is a promise to love your beloved till the that very last breath left in you and even after that! Yes love is all of this which is a lot hard to do as compared to make a call and say 100 times, I love you or sending a forward text message having lyrics of some romantic
song or giving a greeting card telling 101 reasons why you love your beloved! Love is much harder than all of this.  Its not a road full of roses but an ocean of fire which one has to swim through to get to the other end.
Wishes never leave us. Or more precisely to say,we never let them leave away from us. They are always there and like all the other times, they are there then too when we are in love. It is indeed said that love makes the person forget this whole world but I guess person never forgets some of his core wishes. Wishes that he always had, how come one can forget all of those wishes just because now some one is a part of life? And like having wishes is no crime, its no crime either to think about those wishes which one always had before the arrival of that some one special in his/her and keep on working for them. After all if that person whom has just come in your life truly loves you, he will be only happy to see your wish come true and see your smile. There can’t be anything more better than the smile on the face of our love isn’t it? But how we are going to make all of our wishes come true? There is a price of everything and there is certainly a price for each and every wish that we have and want to come true!How deeply we want some thing, its reflected from that price which we are ready to pay to make that wish come true. Bigger the wish is ,pricer its going to be!And  despite it is true that one must do whatever it takes to make his wishes/dreams come true, how far can you stretch the line for this?
Uptill what extent one should go far to make his/her dreams come into reality? Success comes with “selfishness” but how much selfish one has to be or should be? If the answer is to “whatever extent” than the next question is, how about at that time one should be selfish about his/her own wishes when he/she has some one else too along with him/her, some one who is not just any other person but the one who is your love or for whom you are his love! What now? Who is more important, your wish or that person who loves you? Yes its tough but I never mentioned that love is easy or to be in it will be a fairy tale. So what now, you have your love along on one side and your wish on the other, whom you would pick? Tough choice you may say right? No its not a choice that is so hard to make.Remember that with your love along with you, you may be able to accomplish that wish of yours at any point of time in life but if you will lose your love, it may never come back again! With someone along,you can get all the “things” but with just “things” with you, you can’t get back that person whom you have left in the midway.  Back to the question, so what one should do?Either should pick his/her love or pick his/her wish and for that wish, sacrifice that person and his/her love itself? Is it right to do that? Is it right to put countless tears in that very person’s eyes who is happy just by seeing your happiness ,to make sure that your dreams come true let go all of his wishes! Is it right to leave that person in mid way just for this reason that if he is along with you,it will become difficult at some moment to make some wish of yours a reality? Is it right to break some one’s heart into pieces and move on like there is nothing happened just because after doing this,your wishes will come true without any issues or problems? Is it right to stretch the line this far? Its very tough to let go your success and happiness for your love.  Making sacrifices are tough and requires a lot of guts to do so!One have to have a real strong heart filled with immense love for that very person. Its very hard to see something going away right in front of your very eyes which is everything that you ever wished for and still feel no regrets about it. I have not seen many yet who have done that.  Its very hard to let go that chance which may settle your entire life to fulfill a promise that you had made to that someone special!Its really hard to do when you know this chance may never come back again!But if you love that person more than anything, it doesn’t seem to be a very big price. All that comes to mind is so what if this option is gone,if not this ,some another one will come. But that person may not come back again so whether this option is there or not,without any second thought in mind,you pick your love! Its so easy to make a choice when you know what is the priority,your wish or your love! But most of the times it happens that people choose their wishes but not that person,not their love and leave him/her saying that if he would
be there, all of their dreams,wishes, their career,that will not happen and they have to be selfish to get all this!And because they have to be selfish and all this means much more, they have to leave you!Even though you are crying in front of them, they don’t listen and leave saying sorry as they have no time for tears,they want all this and they wont get it if they would be with you.  It hurts so much to hear that! It really does hurt so much to see that for whom you left everything,that very person left you only to get everything else and still calls you selfish! It does hurt much more than it can be expressed in words!There is no pain like the one to see that for that very person you were “nothing” who was always “everything” for you! It hurts so much to see that wishes of better career,better study and better life won but your poor love lost!
When one person does travel thousand of miles to see his beloved,does every possible small or big thing to make his beloved happy,leaves his own wishes and dreams about anything just as they may effect his promises,its not for getting any credits or acclaims! No true lover in this world does anything for his beloved to get acclaims.  He doesn’t need fame for doing it,doesn’t need any credits to be given to him by anyone for making his beloved smile(or atleast trying in the best possible manner to achieve this).All this is just a gesture,just an endeavor to make that person feel special as she really is,to show him/her that he/she is the most special one and the best thing that has ever happened!There is no limit to what can be done for our love and once you have decided,there is no power in the world which can stop you from doing anything for your love!People have sacrificed their entire lives,gave up their kingdoms and served as servants in their beloved’s homes,drowned in the rivers with pots just to fulfill a promise that it wont be possible that on any night,they wont meet!But none of them ever wished for any credits.All what a lover is looking for is that smile which comes up on his beloved’s face,that shine in the eyes which comes when she does see some thing which is done just for her.If one travels thousands of miles to see his love,its not to prove that he is the best in this world or trying to set a record in front of anyone.  All this has nothing to do with world.  The only thing that matters is that few moments that he would be able to spend with that person who is the most special for him,all this is to make a promise turn into reality and failing in doing so will hurt his beloved and indeed him too.  He is not looking for this that people quote his efforts to make his love smile as an example as the world doesn’t matter at all.  That someone special only is the “world” for him.What world thinks or understands,it has no meaning for a lover,what means the most ,what a lover always longs for is that very person for whom this all is done,she/he understands it,she/he understands the efforts that were put into to make all this happen and can feel the emotions of that person!It matters the least if anyone else gives any importance or not to what has been done but few words from that someone special like,’baby I am so much happy that you have done this for me,I know you love me so much!’,means the most,means everything for that person!Words like this make forget all that pain,all the sweat that had went into doing all this!Its not the credit what matters.  There is nothing comparable in front of that feeling that you have done some thing,may be the smallest thing in the world even for your love,no acclaims,no credits can take its place.  Hearing those three magic words ‘baby I love you’,is something for which any lover would give away his/her life even,is the most precious gift. But if instead of
hearing this,if one has to listen that what all he/she has done for his/her beloved,that has made his/her beloved feel embarrassed,that he/she who has done all this is just for his/her selfishness and happiness,it hurts not just the heart but also the soul!It hurts so much that for whom you have done all this,for him/her only this has no meaning.It hurts so much to sit in the corner of your room, crying and waiting endlessly for him/her to come,telling yourself every minute that she/he will surely come doesn’t matter what!But despite waiting with every breath,he/she never comes even knowing that you are waiting. Every day you get up thinking that its not true,its just a bad dream which will be over today but it never gets over and then again you realize that its not a dream,its a cruel reality. You feel that pain again and realize that now its your destiny to live with this pain till the rest of your life. All you think with tears playing in your eyes that what was your fault,what was the mistake that you did? What was so wrong that you did with that someone special for which he/she gave you this lifelong punishment!It hurts so much to see
that your beloved whom you always want to be happy and try your best to take away all of his/her problems, says to you that the only problem he/she has in life is none else but you! Something gets broken deep inside of yours, your heart gets broken down into million pieces!No one can understand the pain when you cross oceans to see your love so that you can be with him/her  but despite knowing that you have done this and you are there,he/she never comes to see you.Its not that every pain has to have an injury over outside of the body.Some wounds happen within and their pain is something which doesn’t get healed by any medicine!Its so difficult to face those penetrating eyes which drill down deep inside of you when they look at you and seems laughing at you because sometime back,you fought with them supporting your love! You always gave answers, stood in support for your love in everything,even when he/she was wrong but there are no answers for those millions of questions which are asked to you when that very love for whom you did all this leaves you in the midway. No one wants to cry but as it is said, one gets the biggest smiles from those only who are the closest and dearest ones,in the same manner ,one gets the deepest pains from those only who are most dearest ones!Pains which only that person can understand truly who is bearing it.  Like a hand will never come to know how it feels to get a slap, how much painful it may be,its only that face knows who has got it, others can’t even imagine that pain,can’t even have an idea what it is to be alive yet die every day!That pain can’t be understood by anyone else.I wrote these lines almost a year back when I wrote about a Short Story  but still these lines from Baba Fareed keep on striking in mind all the time.Have a read,
Ve kasam khuda di tun sanu pyara laggen,
Te tu na kar jor dhigane!
Nange pinde sade maare shammkan,
Te mere ronde ne nain nimane!
Jinnian tan mere te laggian,
Tere ik vi lagge tan tun jane!
Gulam farida dil othe dayie,
Ve jithe agla kadar v jane!

And their meaning in English is :
I love you from my heart truly,
Please don’t hurt me like this!
Dont smack me on my naked body,
And give me just tears in my eyes!
As much wounds I have taken and the pain I am in,
When you will get just one even than you will come to know!
Gulam Farida, give your love at that place only,
Where some one at least understands what love is and respects it!
These are the lines which a lover is saying to his beloved who have left him but he is still looking for her to come back,even knowing that she would never come! These are in Punjabi.I shall explain their meaning in English in a while.Have a read,
Talashdan haan har raste te tainu main hun tak,
Nai sambhal paya haan udon da main aj tak!
Oh sarian shaaman jad tun mere naal hundi c,
Meri har ik gall da makhol kar dindi c!
Kiven samjhwaan dil nu ki tun nahin partana,
Terian yaadan de sahare hi samaan paina kattna!
Yaadan da sahara lai ke main kadon tak jianga,
Ena athruan de vich hi is nu dubo devanga!
Darr hai mainu bas ikko gal da,
Na karin eho haal hor kise dil da!
And their meaning in English is,
Till today my eyes are looking for you,
I have yet to recover from the pain given by you!
All those moments when you were with me,
And used to make fun of everything of me!
How should I convince this heart that now you wont ever be back,
And I have to live this life just with your memories!
Not sure till how long I shall live with memories,
I shall drown this life in these tears only!
The only thing that scares me now,
That you won’t do the same to anyone else!
I shall conclude by saying this only that everything has its importane in this life.Be it a small one or a big one,everything is precious.But the most precious asset in this world are the people who are with us and the relations which we share with them. Its very rare in this small life of ours that we can meet too many of those who can give away themselves for us.Most in this world are those who are ready to take everything! Assets can come and go and so is true for other things.Its very rare to that people are happy to see you happy.Most are willing to take away that happiness and give tears.Heck some are not even satisfied to see tears even in eyes as if those too don’t belong to us.If you have found someone who says that he/she loves you truly and deeply, keep him/her closest to yourself and don’t let him/her go away. Its very rare that someone loves you really and its much more rare that after losing him/her, you may find another who will be alike.Don’t look for a “better one”.There is no such thing called better!Love is not to find the best person in this world.Rather it is to find the “best out of that person”.Don’t lose heart if you have to lose some wishes in exchange of your love,you are still having the best part of the deal.With love being your side, there is no limit on what you can achieve.But if you have traded your love for even the most precious thing in this world,though you may have got the biggest treasure, you still have lost everything.You have lost that someone who would share that joy with you,who could give you a shoulder when you really needed it,who was the one who was truly yours!You never know whom you have lost,may be he/she only was the “one” you were always waiting for! You just never know!

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Comments»

1. sandrar - September 10, 2009

Hi! I was surfing and found your blog post… nice! I love your blog. 🙂 Cheers! Sandra. R.


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